This is the fifth installment of a seven-part essay about the Buddha families.

My mother was an exceptionally intelligent woman. She graduated from Grade 12 when she was 14 years old when the North Bay Normal School gave her special permission to attend their teacher training program. Her yearbook and faded photographs from that year show that my mother was among the most successful students in her class. She wrote poetry, painted watercolours, participated in theatre and was at the top of the honour roll. She graduated with her teaching license when she was 15. But my mother never did teach; instead, she met and married my father, a prospector and inventor. Together they built a successful manufacturing and distribution factory for his Pack Sack Diamond Drills.

I imagine my mother was a member of the vajra family. Vajra literally means sharpness, crystallization, indestructibility. A vajra is a mythical precious stone that cuts through anything, including neurotic emotional tendencies in self and others. In any setting, vajra family members are aware of many possible perspectives, and they are masters of logical evaluation. They have a wide view and can see situations from hundreds of sides. Their intellect is sharp and direct. They usually excel academically.

As a child and teenager, I watched my mother exercise her vajra powers at our family dinner table when my father brought home a problem he was having with the business. It didn’t matter if it was an employee problem, a financial problem or a glitch in the production line — my mother’s fine vajra mind would cut through the issues like a hot knife cuts through butter. She was the same way with family management. In the lean times, we always had food and clothing; in the fat times, we spent wisely.

Vajra people need constant intellectual development and challenge, and my mother lacked such opportunity. As a result, she struggled with the shadow side of the vajra family. She grew angry and rigid, becoming so attached to her point of view that if anyone disagreed with her, she reacted aggressively. She used her vajra edge to ward of contradiction, and left many hurt feelings in her wake. In her later life, her fine analytical mind could find something to complain about in any setting. She became cloudy, turbulent defensive and aggressive and unpleasant to be around. Contentment escaped her.

However, right up to the end of her life, in moments when her anger subsided and her defenses dropped, she showed vajra wisdom. At these times she was like clear water, reflecting the sharp, precise clarity of vajra’s mirror-like wisdom. At these times, visiting her was like sitting beside a calm pond or a reflecting pool. She could see the big picture, pinpoint the issues, cut through emotions and add a twist of tenderness and wit to any conversation. At those times, she realized the best of the vajra family traits.?

Kuya Minogue is the resident teacher at Creston’s ZenWords Zen Centre. For more information, she can be reached at 250-428-3390.